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Is My Sexual Preference Unholy?

I will start from the beginning so that i will be better understood, soo sorry if it is too long





I and my husband met in one of our ICAN classes so we hit it off immediately, became friends, dated then got married. It was blissful, we had our kids, to me life was perfect till one day he changed. 



He started picking fights on irrelevant things, wouldnt talk to me for days, i thought it was just a phase until one day he didnt come back home, after so much calls to family members, friends collegues at work, we found out he left the country with another woman, this was 4 years ago, we later found out he paid for the house rent for two years and he vowed never to have anything to do with me and my kids anymore.



Even after pleadings from family members he still refused so i moved on, believing that one day he would come back to me because i believe his actions was not normal, he asked for divorce, i refused cos my bible is against it (luke 16:18). Since then God has been soo good to me, i've moved into my own home(a working mom) and God has been taking care of my kids for me.





Now 2 years ago, i met this lady who was serving(nysc), i see her as my younger sister so we talk alot, so she knows all about me, she helps me at home, with my kids and all.



One day we were talking about sex generally, so she said she can satisfy my urge, i was shocked, i dont want to go into details but that was how it started.



Mind you i do not insert anything into my "VJ", what she does is the normal licking and sucking till i "CUM" she's in a serious relationship with a man so i do not do same act to her and she doesnt ask for anything in return(from a wealthy home).I dont see myself as a lesbian since i dont indulge in it moreso i still love my husband.



I agreed to it because it's safer than having sex and contacting std in the process, i am human, i have needs and i dont want to commit adultery cos i'm still married and i believe my husband would come back to me, i feel no guilt whatsoever for this act.



Reason why i brought this here is to know your views about this act, i want to have diff. opinions from matured minds so no insults please, thank you.



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